A Fully Functioning Babe Lair

You invested in the night-scope. Things paid off… With a minimal amount of confusion and half-cockedness you’ve managed to persuade that member of the opposite sex to come back to your bedsit. Now what? Perhaps an hour of COD4 on multiplayer? Some suggestive conversation about substitute rumble packs for the SIXAXIS controller?

NO! Did the cavemen need a wireless controller? Then nor do you… Of course, they had the benefits of wearing only a loincloth and the gentle play of firelight across their dusky bodies, so clearly what you need is to get old school… What you need to do is put out the overhead, drop the wall bed and get some of these badboys on the go. Mathmos have been helping create an atmosphere conducive to relaxation and romance since 1963, which is practically prehistoric. They’ve succeeded for a reason. That reason is illustrated here, by Jane Fonda.

Now. You can go the ambient route, with the Space Projector, which throws light through glooping discs part-filled with coloured oil to create an effect like this:

Or you can take the more direct approach and set up a couple of these little beautys:

If a gently glowing, scintillating phallic symbol all up in your inner sanctum doesn’t make the right statement, then you’re going to have to reach for the Barry White, close your eyes and hope for a miracle.

Tags: ambience Gadgets jane fonda lava lamp lights mathmos seduction walrus of lurve